My village
There’s something about it taking a village to raise a child. This is a concept that we see work in people's lives all the time. No matter their situation, it’s something that ticks along backstage. When you look around, it’s easy to see it working every day in doctors, in grandparents, in lollipop people. But at the core of all of this, is love.
The village is the only way I have made it this far. As a young carer in my childhood, we relied on parents from the school playground, my dance family, and our neighbours. When I was fostered, we relied on people in the area, school, and social workers. There were two years between Mum dying and being fostered. I couldn’t see a village. There was a breakdown. There was chaos. There was danger. And then there was a new home, a new start and a new village. My village now looks like my besties, their families, my colleagues, my therapist, my gym bros… A notable mention to the lovely guy at Tesco who always smiles, asks about my day and wishes me a good shop. He does this to every customer and it never fails to put a smile on their face, no matter how their day is.
The teachers who made the difference
My village is constantly changing because of age, location, family - you get my gist. But one group that has saved me every time has been teachers. Those of you familiar with Messy Fostering will already know this but here’s a quick overview:
Mum died, two years of hell, got fostered, I refused respite, teacher became respite carer, summers with them and now stuck with me forever.
The teacher who took me home was Jo. Jo was the designated teacher for looked after children. A loving and slightly mad turn of events meant that she became my respite carer. I spent four summers with her family, showing them how to bust a move on Just Dance. Eleven years on and they are still very much in my village.
The year before I was fostered, I had a PE teacher who, at the end of the day, would often see me at the school gates and check in to make sure I was okay before going home. She didn’t know what was going on but she always showed warmth and kindness before the toughest part of my day.
I moved schools for A Levels, which was one of the hardest parts of my fostering journey. I left the school I had been in for years and at the time, I was very much struggling with trauma from my life before. I was greeted by three teachers who would change my life - DG, Mrs K and Mrs C. Looking back, mentally I was more scrambled than ever. Each of them showed me love and compassion in different ways. Whether that be staying with me until a flashback passed or just telling me to get it together when spiralling before an exam (I’m a tough love kind of gal). They saved my life as much as my foster family, as much as my social workers, as much as anyone who came before.
What a village looks like for care-experienced people
My point is, we all have a village, no matter how big or small. But a village for someone who is care-experienced might look different. It might not look like a mum, dad, and people they have been friends with since birth. It might look like teachers, staff in the local supermarket, people from past foster placements. You don’t have to be a full-time foster carer to make a difference. You could be a caring colleague, a neighbour, or someone who smiles when seeing the same person during your weekly shop.
For people struggling to find their village, as they say in Love Actually (the second-best film to Shrek 2): “if you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around”.
Fostering is all about giving children a safe, stable place to call home. Foster carers play a vital role in offering love, consistency, and support, helping children build relationships, recover from difficult experiences, and achieve their full potential. Through the government’s ongoing reforms to strengthen fostering, we are working to recruit and retain more foster carers, improve the support they receive, and ensure every child in care grows up with the stability and sense of belonging they deserve.
The 2026 fostering reforms contain significant measures aimed directly at strengthening local authority recruitment and retention, including:
- National action, including a national communications campaign
- Enhanced regional collaboration through the expansion of regional recruitment hubs
- Supporting innovation
- Strengthening support for foster carers
- A simplified rulebook
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